Coffee Crisis Review
By Steven Seggerman
I knew I was in for a crazy ride when the narrator is an old man wearing a tinfoil hat ranting about invading aliens stealing our wi-fi to create their own deep web. To top it off you’ll take on the role of Nick or Ashley, two baristas who’ve taken on the responsibility of saving the world from aliens. Armed only with coffee beans, dish wear, and a whole lot of spunk, they will fight through a plethora of enemies all while downing buckets of coffee. The alien smashing is beautifully coupled with a fantastic metal score that fits excellent with the insane story. Each power-up has it’s own unique metal track to amp-up the action even more.
Coffee Crisis is inspired by some of the best in Beat ‘em up’s, the likes of Streets of Rage, and Final Fight, and It does an excellent job of capturing that old school feel. Running through the streets, picking up power-up’s, and random weapons, racking up my score all while beating down aliens and old people! (Possibly aliens in disguise? Wasn’t clear, I attacked first and asked questions later.) The story behind the development of the game is just as exciting as the game itself. Mega Cat Studios owner met real-life Nick and Ashley at their very real Black Forge Coffee House! Through a mutual love and respect for the genre, they combined forces, and resources, to create Coffee Crisis. Not only did they release the game digitally for consoles, but also made a physical cartridge version for the Sega Genesis!
I remember as a kid getting excited when I reached the infamous “Beat the Car to a Pulp” bonus level in Final Fight, and smashing the heck out of some random poor guy’s ride, for whatever reason. Sure enough bonus missions made their way into this game as well helping to break up the constant fighting. The music and unique story elements are great, but unfortunately, it doesn’t do much in the way to set itself apart from the legends it’s based itself off of. All these features are great, but they’ve all been done before, and I was hoping to find something new along the way I might not find anywhere else.
If you’re a fan of the genre, you’ll get a kick out of Coffee Crisis, and while it doesn’t do much to reinvent the genre, it’s got a lot of heart. I give it 7 probed metal-heads out of 10.